
Forget about that fashion forward b**ch in "The Devil Wears Prada", I work under the direction of a different evil God. She's a slovenly, hairy, underhanded, despicable, nosy, unprofessional woman. The mere sight of her disgusts me on a daily basis.
Day in and day out I am subjected to her negativity. With her, the glass is always half empty; the contents are always murky. Everyone is always "stupid" just because she deems the so. To make matters worse, we share a small office with absolutely no privacy.
It is shallow to criticize her attire, this I know, but we work in a shallow environment: A PR firm. Our colleagues (both young and older) traipse around the office in the newest, trendiest, fashion forward garments. Meanwhile, SHE parades around the office in Capri pants (no matter the season with socks and bright white sneakers). As if that weren't enough this devil doesn't put a razor to her gargantuan chubakaesque legs. Recently an impromptu meeting was held with a vendor, myself, my boss' boss and HER. The representative from the vendor kept staring at legs as if they were scaring her. The exposure of hairy shins in late October must have caught her off guard. She was probably not used to summer attire in mid-autumn. Neither am I; in mid-autumn, late autumn, early winter, mid-winter, late winter or early spring. However, I'm subjected to this unprofessional get up Monday -Friday.
Enough of the clothes I think I need to address her hairstyle. Can someone please tell me why she wears her hair in two: A ponytail on top - at the base, a poofy turquoise or purple scrungie. For the bottom, she freaks it with a braid and a different colored thin scrungie at the bottom. Wow!

SHE has a visible mustache that adolescent boys would be jealous of, yet she does absolutely nothing about it.
I have offered on more than one occasion to make her over, but she declines incessantly. Ah well, you can lead a horse to water, but you can't force them to drink. I use that analogy for HER sake because she won't do anything she doesn't want to do. To be honest, I think she's depressed. I actually feel sorry for her. However, there are those times that she gets under my skin and makes me it crawl. When those instances arise, I have no sympathy for her whatsoever. As I write this I feel absolutely no remorse.
SHE made my work life a living hell for so many months; finally its over. I don't have to deal with her and her antics anymore. She's now the problem of someone else - Homer!
5 comments:
LMFAO
I swear you almost made me choke when describing this womans legs. I am sooo sorry that you had to put up with that crap!
Rox
awww its obvious she has a mental problem, that or shes a complete asshole....either way its not your problem anymore :D
wow. You murdered that pig of a pig on this blog. Death by the Blogger.
Your description was hilarious!!! She is a mess. Thank goodness you are away from her!!!
LMAO! Listen to me child! I made the mistake of reading this at work....I ALWASY know better but i went against my gutt and I started reading it at my desk.....I laughed so hard my lungs almost fell out. "Gargantuan"???? OMFG you are too funny.
She sounds terribly pathetic if you ask me...and if I were you I wouldn't waste the energy that it takes to be angry at her.
Send that beast to the zoo where she belongs..
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