"My boss has me under so much stress right now I can't take it! Where are my Newports? That client just annoyed the hell outta me, where are my Virginia Slims? I'm about to kill my co-wkr, where the hell are my Marlboros?" If you're a cigarette smoker these scenarios are probably all too familiar. Cigarette smokers may argue that they need to release that tension before they snap and "go postal". This may be true, but what entitles them to indefinite 15 minute increment breaks from work? WTF? I'm sorry, is there some reason why you need a special outlet to release your stress? Are you a descendant of God himself? Was the Virgin Mary your Auntie? Were Adam and Eve your Godparents? Was Noah the best man in your parents wedding?
I don't smoke so when I am harbouring resentment for anyone I internalize it and do my work. Do I really have a choice? If I want a break I wait until lunchtime and enjoy my free time. Period. If were to say "Boss, I would like to be able to go outside whenever I get ticked off for 15 minutes at a time before I go the kitchen, get the knife reserved for cutting birthday cakes, stab a few of my co-workers and push you out of the f**in window. Is that okay with you?" Sounds absurd right? In all actuality, a smoker getting a break is just as insane to me.
Let's call a smoke break what it is: a 15 minute break to go outside (because of either stress or boredom), inhale poisonous toxins, vent, joke and/or lolly gag with fellow smoking buddies (or jones on the phone). Damn, who thought of implementing this rule? I think that person is probably dead now. They died of either lung, throat or esophageal cancer.
Do cigarette smokers have to make this time up at some point in the day? No! They get to leave when the non-smokers (who have been glued to their seats festering in their hatred towards all mankind) do. Where's the equality?
I say that we start giving out Nicorette gum or let the non-smokers get a "get the f**k outta my face before I cut you break". Then and only then will the equal opportunity rule be enforced!
1 comment:
I get stuck with on the phones when the smokers go out to take their breaks. I am not mad at them taking their breaks, but I think it should go around- like the alkie taking a swig when they jsut can't take it anymore! I just don't like covering for someone becasue they have a damn habit. What the hell is that!
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